Monday, January 27, 2014

Brain Things in the Head

Words words words words words words words

Phew.  Got the opening sentence over with!

The SATs and ACTs are pretty much the funnest tests ever.  JUST KIDDING.  (And yes, I know 'funnest' isn't a word, but I'm a rebel and I do what I want.)  Anyway, I've taken each test twice, and I have friends who have taken them too.  Yep, we nerds party hard.

The point is, these tests are basically inevitable.  If you haven't taken them yet, then you will in a year or two.  And then we're all in the same boat.  For now, those people who have taken them can reminisce, and those who haven't can get an idea of what to look forward too.

Here are the things I think while taking the SATs and ACTs!

Me: I feel like all the big high schoolers are judging me for being younger than them.

Me: What the heck is that pipsqueak doing taking these tests?!  What is she, nine?  GET OUT.  You don't belong here!

Me: Oh.  I guess that's how those high schoolers feel about me.

Me: Oh my God stop sweating.  Why are you nervous?  It doesn't even count!  STOP.

Me: What the crap is wrong with these desks?  They're freaking tiny!  My freaking book is about to fall off– yep, there it goes.

Me: And we'll never be royals... STOP SINGING AND FOCUS.

Me: Oh my God I know this one!  I am so smart!

<Reads question>
Me:
Image courtesy of About.com

Test proctor: "You have twenty minutes for this test."
Me: HAHAHA you're funny.  Oh crap.

Me: Writing section!  Yay! UNLEASH THE GRAMMAR NAZI!

Me: I'm hungry.

Me: When do we have a break?

Me: Why did I only pack healthy food?

Me: *Popular girl voice* Skip it, skip it, it's too hard. (This is an inside joke.  If you get it, you will laugh.  If you don't get it, you should laugh anyway.)

Me: OH MY GOD THERE'S NO TIME LEFT.

Me: I'm really hungry.

Me: Can we eat during the test?  No?  Fine.

Me: What the crap is making that sound?

Me: Can you tell the freaking ventilation system to shut up?

Me: SHUT UP.

Me: I'm hot.
<Test proctor opens window>
Me: I'm cold.

Me: I need food.

Test proctor: "You have five minutes remaining for this test."
Me: OH MY GOD I'm only like halfway through.  Okay, letter A, you're my bud from now on.

Me:  Okay, I think it's that one.  No wait, it could be that one too.  Or that one.  Screw it, I'll just skip it.

<Reads question>
Me: I understood the words "equation" and "variable."  Go me.

Me: What type of person thinks anyone in the history of anywhere would know this?  I mean really.

So, yeah, the SATs and ACTs are a party.

Just sayin'.

3 comments:

  1. (This isn't Julia commenting. It's just Julia's ID.) This has to be your funniest blog yet. I love the Madagascar reference in your title. And I LOVE the "skip it, skip it, it's too hard". Ha ha ha ha.

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  2. Bahahahahahahahaha that was AMAZING. All of those have happened to me at one point or another. I wish I could have taken it with you this year :)

    The "skip it, skip it, it's too hard" just made my day.

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  3. This is hilarious! I feel like this can apply to all tests too : )

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